Today, I want to tell you my delivery story. I know, there are millions of stories out there, each one as unique as the next, which is exactly why you need to hear mine. There are so many stories and sometimes people will make you feel like you have to have the same story as them, that's not the case. Hopefully my story will help you or even just open your eyes to what can happen even against any plan you may have.
First, let me start by saying that I am a planner. If you've been following my blog, you know very well now that I over plan everything! It's a real issue. So naturally, I had a birth plan. I knew what I wanted, and how I wanted it. What I didn't know, was that sometimes more than not, no one, including your own body, cares about what your plan may be. That was certainly the case for me on delivery day.
So here we were, Monday, August 22, 2016 at 5:30am, sitting in the hospital waiting room to be called back to our labor and delivery room for our scheduled induction. 6:30am rolls around and I finally start Pitocin. Things were going good. I started at 2cm and let the nurse know ahead of time that I was fully prepared to labor as long as possible without an epidural. The Pitocin was administered and things were going great. I didn't feel anything at all, but contractions were about 2 to 3 minutes apart. Sometime between 8 and 10am, I progressed to 4cm. At this point, my back was on fire! I had back labor more than anything, which was to be expected because I had fractured my back sophomore year of high school in cheer and knew that I was going to have to deal with back labor one day. It was around this time that I decided to go ahead and get medication to ease the pain. I let my husband, and the nurse, know that my goal was to make it to 6cm without any epidural because I had heard that epidurals can slow down labor and typically around 6cm is the best time to get it because the chance of it slowing was low. Things were going great, the medication was amazing and really helped my back. Well, 7pm rolls around and I had finally made it to 6cm and requested the epidural. I was so excited because 1) I met my goal and waited until 6cm to get the epidural, 2) I had labored 12 hours and had hopes that because I was at 6cm I'd progress quicker, and 3) the doctor's made it sound like I was laboring wonderfully and that he would be arriving within a few hours, or so they thought. Well, for five long and emotional hours, I was stuck at 6cm and my OB was pressuring me to prepare for a c-section. At this point, after every cervical check, I was in tears. Terror was all that was on my mind. I didn't want a c-section, nor did I plan for it. I wanted to experience the joy of vaginal birth. I wanted that moment. 12am, still stuck at 6cm, we made the final call to move forward with the c-section. Needless to say, I was terrified. They escorted my husband, dressed in full doctor scrubs, out the door and prepped me. 2am arrives and the doctor's were wheeling me back to the operating room. Drugs, drugs, and more drugs. Mind you, I NEVER take medication. If I'm sick, I fight it off. I will find any means possible to avoid taking medication, but for this, I'm glad drugs exist. They started off by administering a second epidural, then proceeded to poke me and pinch me and ask "can you feel that?" They continued until I could no longer feel the pinching. Next thing I know, my husband is beside me and they've started cutting me open. 2:21am, we hear the soft cries of our son. It was amazing! He was a beautiful sight. Things were going great for a few minutes, but then I started puking so they administered more drugs to help with the nausea, which only made me more groggy. According to my husband, because I was so drugged up I couldn't remember, the doctor's were worried because I wouldn't stop bleeding. Apparently, my uterus was exhausted from laboring for 18 total hours and wouldn't contract to stop the bleeding. The worst part, I don't remember any of that. I don't even remember holding my son for the first time. My husband recounts that it was the scariest moment of his life. To see his wife shaking due to being in shock and not even being able to hold my own head up. From what he told me, we were in the recovery room for about 2 hours. before being moved into our postpartum room. To be honest, those 2 hours, I have not a single clue what took place. I do remember waking up in the postpartum room and seeing my in-laws walking in to meet our son, other than that, I have no recollection.
I'll be honest, recovery was rough. Walking was darn near impossible. Trying to sit while going to the bathroom was painful. Just rolling over in the bed was a challenge. Nothing can prepare you for the pain of a c-section, but I managed to push myself and meet all the goals set out for me and we were able to go home early! Our nurses were telling me that I wouldn't be able to go home until Friday at the earliest, but I wanted to be able to recover at home, so I met every goal set in front of me and by Thursday afternoon, we were being discharged from the hospital.
To say the very least, this was an interesting experience. I will say, I am very envious of the women who are able to deliver vaginally. It had always been my dream to be able to deliver vaginally, but I didn't want to risk my child's life or health by laboring when my body clearly just wasn't doing what it was supposed to do. I do wish I could've been able to remember that first time I held my son, but the drugs hindered me and the only proof I have of my first time holding him, is in pictures on my iPhone. Overall, I am so thankful our son is here and we are all healthy, but this just goes to show that we can make plans, but we must be understanding and prepared when they don't go our way.
