 |
| (source) |
Father's Day is always a hard time for some. For me, it is a simple reminder that mine is gone. I tend to fight a lot of emotional battles with myself on Father's Day (and Mother's Day, if we're being honest, but this is about them). I fight a constant battle between the smiles to remind my father-in-law and step-father how important they are and how thankful I truly am to have them both in my life verses the tears when I think about living the rest of my life without hugs from my own father. I guess life is like that sometimes. Sometimes it's easy to find the happiness and other days it's hard to be reminded of the things we are missing.
Let me back track to September 9, 2008, my sixteenth birthday, also known as, the day my father passed away. It still leaves a wound that I'm not entirely sure will ever be repaired. Although there are men in my life that help to bandage the wound, it doesn't relieve, reduce, or remove the pain. I remember the day of and after he died more vividly than I remember the two years that followed. Hard to believe, huh? I can sit here and relive the story of his death but that's not what this post is about. It's about the father's.
To my crazy/loving Father: You were so smart, kind, gentle, my true friend, and even in your darkest hours just before leaving this earth, you were loving. I remember you kissing me goodbye the night before you took your life, telling me Happy Birthday and that you loved me. I didn't think anything of it at the time, but that would be the last time I'd hear those words. And man, I miss those words. Dad, you were brave. I know you struggled with alcoholism and drug-abuse for most of your life, but you kept me safe, you provided for me. I don't care who you were or what you did as an individual out in the world because you were such an incredible father, you really were. I miss buying you ties, wallets, and just fun/dumb stuff that would make you laugh. So today, I want to wish all the father's, including mine, in Heaven, a very Happy Father's Day. If you're like me and are struggling today with the loss of your own father, just remember he is always watching you and loves you.
To my kind-hearted/inspiring Father-In-Law: I seriously do not know where I would be without you. You are half of the reason Erik is here and without him...well let's just focus on the positive here. You have always been a rock to lean on. You walked me down the aisle to the boy that was your son, and the man that became my husband. You are always so kind, so loving, so warming to be around. Although you have had your moments where I've thought "oh man, he's tough," you've always shown me love. I have felt, since day one, that you were more of a father figure to me and you've proven that year after year. Erik, I'm sure, has some fun and inspiring stories to share and lord knows you are the topic of so many conversations when we talk about kids. Erik aspires to be like you as a father, and I would be so proud if he could be half of the father you are because you are a diamond in the rough. How lucky am I that I get to be your daughter-in-law? And you better believe that I count that blessing every day! Also, thank you for letting me take over cooking, occasionally, on the weekends. I love our "bonding" time when it's just me and you in the kitchen while everyone else is busy. Oh, and thank you for always being able to reach the things that my short little arms just can't seem to grab. You are such an incredible man and I appreciate you more and more everyday. I love you so much! Happy Father's Day!!!
To my Step-Father with his new Mrs.:
First off, thank you for loving my mom. I know you cared for her in the best way you could and lord knows that woman was a mess. More importantly, thank you for loving me. Thank you for always being there when I need you, in the good and bad, you were there. I know we had a rough start but our relationship has grown so much and I am so blessed to have you in my life. I am also thankful that you found Robin. She is amazing and she probably could have taken you and said "her mom is gone, stop talking to her," but instead she welcomed me. You did a good job, she's really incredible! I also appreciate you texting me and keeping me updated when you were in Afghanistan. I was constantly worried about you and would constantly pray for you. You have been such a huge blessing in my life. I am so thankful for all the times you included me in things and I just can't image my life without you in it. You just fit so well! You really have become a father figure in my life and I trust your judgment and word. Happy Father's Day Brandon!!!
First off, thank you for loving my mom. I know you cared for her in the best way you could and lord knows that woman was a mess. More importantly, thank you for loving me. Thank you for always being there when I need you, in the good and bad, you were there. I know we had a rough start but our relationship has grown so much and I am so blessed to have you in my life. I am also thankful that you found Robin. She is amazing and she probably could have taken you and said "her mom is gone, stop talking to her," but instead she welcomed me. You did a good job, she's really incredible! I also appreciate you texting me and keeping me updated when you were in Afghanistan. I was constantly worried about you and would constantly pray for you. You have been such a huge blessing in my life. I am so thankful for all the times you included me in things and I just can't image my life without you in it. You just fit so well! You really have become a father figure in my life and I trust your judgment and word. Happy Father's Day Brandon!!!
To Erik:
I know this probably comes as a shock since some will probably say "he isn't really a father," but we both know that isn't true. You are the reason I was blessed with two angel babies. You have always been such an amazing part of my life. You've supported me through the good and bad, the sickness and health, and you've been so patient with me. I know, just by watching you with other kids, that you will be an amazing father when God blesses us with our earth baby. You are such an inspiration and although you aren't quite up to par with your dad hehe, you still amaze me with your strength and determination. I wish more men in the world were like you because then others would be able to see what it's like to marry a man who is just absolutely astounding! You take my breath away by how loving and caring and honest you are. I am so thankful that you stuck beside me and pushed through the infertility struggles right there with me, you even did it with a smile and open arms. Happy Father's Day to you my sweet husband and father of our two precious angel babies!
I know this probably comes as a shock since some will probably say "he isn't really a father," but we both know that isn't true. You are the reason I was blessed with two angel babies. You have always been such an amazing part of my life. You've supported me through the good and bad, the sickness and health, and you've been so patient with me. I know, just by watching you with other kids, that you will be an amazing father when God blesses us with our earth baby. You are such an inspiration and although you aren't quite up to par with your dad hehe, you still amaze me with your strength and determination. I wish more men in the world were like you because then others would be able to see what it's like to marry a man who is just absolutely astounding! You take my breath away by how loving and caring and honest you are. I am so thankful that you stuck beside me and pushed through the infertility struggles right there with me, you even did it with a smile and open arms. Happy Father's Day to you my sweet husband and father of our two precious angel babies!
To the rest of the father's in this big 'ol world: Thank you for being there for your children. The greatest quote that I've read is: "any man can make a baby, but it takes a real man to raise it." You are real man and the women of the world thank you for being the father of their children and raising them.
Happy Father's Day!
 |
| (source) |
